Adventures in sysadmin

[djm4_lj]

What just happened to the Sibelius web server (with a certain amount of dramatic licence):

Me: OK, server, I want you to upgrade this small package (OpenSSL) to the latest version.
Server: Sure thing, boss! I'm just reinstalling the entire Perl system now.
Me: Hang on a moment. Things tend to break when I reinstall Perl.
Every Perl module on the system: Where the fuck has Perl gone?
Me: Calm down. I've just re-installed it over there.
Every Perl module on the system except DBI: No! We're sulking, and we don't want to look over there.
DBI: Oh yes, there it is. Thanks! Where are all the other modules, though?
Every Perl module on the system except DBI: And now DBI's disappeared, too. Waaaagh!
Me: No. Look. It's quite simple. Perl is here, and DBI is here. DBI, all the other modules are over there.
Every Perl module on the system except DBI: You can't fool me. That might look a bit like DBI at first sight, but it's not the real DBI. That's some sort of heretic DBI who believes in the false Perl. We want our DBI back, and we're not talking to that splitter.
DBI: Bah! I'm not talking to those heretics over there; it's their Perl that's false, not mine.

Took a little while to sort that one out.

Comments

Nice.

[booklectica]

Hmm, I wonder if there's a market for some kind of series of geek fairytales?

[new-brunette.livejournal.com]

There, but for the grace of god... :)

[ajva.livejournal.com]

Congratulations on the most fun geek post ever! :o)

To paraphrase/rip off

[ravenevermore.livejournal.com]

'I refuse to prove that I exist, said Perl...'

[plumsbitch.livejournal.com]

Maybe someone's been setting mental blocks up on your server a la Mostly Harmless?

[barakta]

And people think we're mad when we talk about computers/programs/scripts/processes as if they have personalities :)

I feel your pain.

Natalya

Re: Adventures in sysadmin

[pir-anha.livejournal.com]

oh yeah. i've been in that play. *augh*!

[mattp.livejournal.com]

*sigh* I know that scenario well. The worst case of dependency hell was introduced when I tried to install Ximian packages on my Debian box. It tried to install a new set of X libraries, except that some of those had conflicting interdependencies.
I think I'll leave it a while before attempting that again.